All married couples should learn the art of battle as they should learn the art of making love. Good battle is objective and honest - never vicious or cruel. Good battle is healthy and constructive, and brings to a marriage the principle of equal partnership. (Ann Landers)

Having a good marriage requires work and commitment from both husband and wife. Without both people directing energy toward making their marriage work, it won't. High divorce rates prove that many have lost the desire to go the longer, more difficult route. Many couples today cheat themselves out of a fulfilling relationship because they base their commitment to one another on the feelings of love rather than on a decision to love one another. Feelings fluctuate with the weather. One day, because of the good fortune surrounding the circumstances of our relationship we are on top of the world. The next day, because of some difficulty we have encountered as a couple, it seems the world is on top of us. Emotion alone is a very unreliable foundation for a lasting and happy marriage. Many partners are satisfied with one another when they feel in love; and totally bewildered when the emotion of love no longer sweeps them off their feet. At that point some divorce and others become involved in an affair. Multitudes just stay married and fall in and out of love with every change in the seasons of life.

How do we control the feelings that lead to discontentment? By forcing our feeling to follow our commitment, instead of allowing our commitment to follow our feelings. Our Grandfathers intuitively practiced this principle, saying to themselves, "We got into this relationship because we wanted to and we are going to make it work." Most of them made it work and were content in the relationship they developed.

Couples often enter marriage with the allusion that they have found the perfect partner and everything will be perfect. It is almost humanly impossible for a husband to live up to 100% of the expectation the wife has envisioned for him in the relationship. The wife will not make every dream her husband had for the marriage come true. Happiness comes to those who are willing to stay together and work at it. The Bible states two principles in Ephesians 5:22-32 that govern success in relationships which have never failed. The first, wives, respect and honor your husbands. And the second, husbands, love your wives. When a husband loves his wife, and discovers the practical ways he can show her love, warm feelings are continually nurtured in his heart for her. When a wife honors her husband, the emotion of love is stirred in her heart for him. Love is a commitment that we make to one another—a commitment to honor our relationship and seek happiness in it. We must not expect more from our marriage than we give in it—that is selfishness and selfishness is the cause of many marital problems. Marriage is a sacrifice on both sides of the sexes that yields dividends far surpassing the sacrifices made. "A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person." (Mignon McLaughlin)